Things you do not say to a mom- most importantly ME!
My list could go on, but these are my all time TOP 5 ones that I hear all too much.
1. What’s wrong with him?
You know moms do not do well when others pick out flaws in our children. I will be the first to mention when there is something he needs to work on- you in the other hand can keep your mouth shut thank you very much.
2. Give me one week with him…….
Excuse me? And Why, what will you do? You will what? Fix him? Change him? As if I am doing something wrong? Step back…..step away slowly…….
3. If he is hungry, he will eat it.
It might work for most kids, but not ALL kids. Ever heard of the exception? And if I hear one more story of how when you were younger there was only one meal for dinner and if you didn’t eat, you went to bed hungry, I think I will scream.
4. You look tired.
Well, moms are tired. We work all day long, some with multiple children. So,
Thanks, if that’s your way of saying I look like crap, then you are too kind!
5. You look like such a mom.
As if there is something wrong with being a mom, society defines looking like “a mom” with negative attributes, I.e mom jeans, fluffy belly, saggy boobs, flats, “mom” haircut- I find that unfair……..If I want to rock high waist jeans and ballet flats I freaking most certainly will. I will do it with pride!
What is something that was said to you that rubbed you the wrong way? Please share……so at least I know I am not alone with this. Or maybe I am. Oh no……..am I?
I’m sure you’ve heard this story before, Joy. An older women in reference to my (at the time) 1 year-old son’s long eyelashes; “Well, that’s a waste!” My response, “I’m sure his girlfriends won’t think so.”
shannonheather@gmail.com I do remember that! The things people say! I swear………..
My daughter is an exception to MOST rules of thumb and because of that we handle many situations individually, in ways that work for us. That said, one thing others say that makes my head want to explode is… “But…”. ex. She is such a sweet girl, BUT… She certainly tried hard to “x,y,z” with the rest of the group, BUT… She seemed to enjoy the activity, BUT…
My daughter is not like every other child, and that makes me love her EVEN more, but I want to lash out at others who feel it necessary to point out her differences.
~Mini rant over 🙂
mkyhos@verizon.net Agree! I know what you mean! Isn’t it our differences that make us unique! She is a wonderful little lady and an individual with her own lovely qualities!
I get sideways looks a lot because my son is exceptionally big for his age and always has been. He is now seven but looks like an 11/12 year old and when he acts like he’s 7 people give me a look. I just look at them and say, “What? He’s 7.” Which is followed by, “He’s only 7? What do you feed him?” or “How big is his father?”
Yikes! I can’t think any off of the top of my head- That’s one benefit of a crappy short term memory, lol! I do hate the “You look tired” comment though!
shelldransart@yahoo.com Short term memory would be good in this case. I could forget all of them- but No- alas my memory is insanely good- and will remember all the horrid things people say-LOL
Well, since my son has eczema people say MANY things to HIM when his face flares up. Some of them have been…. “what’s on your face?” …. ” awwww, do you have poison ivy” and many many more. It is then followed by Nate hiding behind me and the person lecturing me on all the creams and things I can do to help him once I’ve told them its eczema. While I appreciate people trying to help – I think there is a way to do it. It may also be the kind of day I’m having if I’m more accepting of their comments. Sometimes it is followed by — “but you are still so cute/handsome”. My child is beautiful!!! All children are beautiful. It just so happens that people who don’t have kids are the “best” parents. Everyone is different. I appreciate curiosity and welcome questions as long as you direct them at me and NOT my 4 year old. I think people also need to think before they speak. Joy…. I have many more things I could add to this —- you are definitely NOT alone!
I love this post, and that you point out how negative it is to look like a mom. I love looking like a mom, damnit!
I am probably the worst offender of all because I tend to throw my daughter under the bus before others can, which ironically, means that they go out of their way to praise how wonderful she is. How well behaved and attentive, etc. She is my heart and my baby but she can push my buttons and wear me out and I tend to lead with that, almost to deflect anyone’s personal suggestions or observations.
Great list. Now, as a Grandma, there’s a whole new level of people with comments/advice. I have 4 kids who’ve procreated and now my husband and I are 3 – 4 weeks from welcoming our 11th grandchild. The best one for us has been: DON’T YOUR KIDS HAVE TELEVISION? Yeah, that. We love our B-I-G family and I’ll love LOVE LOVE 100 grandkids, if that happens. People. Sheesh. Thanks for this post. You made me smile and scream, too…
It’s meant as a compliment but I hate it when older folks tell me my kids are so obedient. Like I’m training dogs!
Hmmmm…let me think! How about, “Are you pregnant?” No, that’s just my post-baby body that is not back to normal.
As a mom of 5 kids I hear a lot of: God bless you! (I seldom sounds like I’m being blessed.) Well, at least ya got your girl! (4 boys, 1 girl) You know what causes that, right? You’re done now, right? You’ve got your hands full. I don’t know why complete strangers feel the need or right to comment about my family. Some days I’m polite, others I’m a little snarky back.
I hate it when people comment that I’ve put on weight when I haven’t.
Hi! Stopping by from Mom Bloggers Club. Great blog!
Have a nice day!